Your Love is Strong

Just a short note before I go to bed.

I really like God and I'm really enjoying reading His Scriptures these last couple of days. My reading has me going through Leviticus right now and it's true, it's full of rules. But at the same time, the rules are a lot of the time common sense principles (i.e. don't sleep with your daughter) and guidelines for living in community (i.e. do not murder, do not twist justice to favor the poor or the rich). But they also say so much, I think, about the LORD and what He considers important. He really thinks of a lot of things. Like He knows there are going to be poor people. No matter what. Soooo, He makes provision for them. He instructs the farmers not to glean everything out of their fields. When they drop something, leave it. Don't go back and pick it up. Don't take every bunch of grapes from the vine. Leave some. The poor will come and take it. Don't be greedy. It's also different from a straight-up hand out, though. The poor still have to come along and do the work of searching the field for what has been left behind. See? So much he thinks of! Then there are the random ones like "don't trim the hair of your temples or your beards." I don't get that one. But it must be important.

Side note: homosexuality is thrown in there right alongside don't sleep with your daughter or granddaughter or stepmother ... as in ... it's true, it's not how we were designed to be, it's not wholeness and it is sin against yourself and the other person ... but it is NOT in bold letters. It is not in all caps. There are no hashmarks indicating a trending topic (re: twitter). It's there. Very clearly. But it's also very clear that it's the same as all the rest. Just don't do it. If you do, when you do screw up, the steps for reconciliation and atonement have all been laid out already.

God thinks of everything.

Jon Foreman's "Your Love is Strong" has been running through my head ever since we sang it in church yesterday. What gets me the most is a variation on the Lord's prayer which he launches into very passionately. It's a poignant moment of the song. You should check it out.

"Two things You told me

That You are strong

And You love me

Yes, You love me

Your Love is, Your Love is, Your Love is

Strong

Our God in Heaven hallowed by They name above all names

Your kingdom come Your will be done

On Earth as it is in Heaven

Give us today our daily bread

Forgive us weary sinners

Keep us far from our vices

And deliver us from these prisons ..."

Amen.

The first (little) Easter

Today is the first Sunday in Lent and that means it's my first little Easter of the season. Let me tell you what, at first I scoffed at this idea of taking Sundays "off" or releasing myself from my strict fast on Sundays, as if it was a weakness. But after the joy I've experienced thus far today, I say "let's have more of this!" This is what Sundays, as Sabbaths, as days of rest are supposed to be like every week! No wonder the year of Jubilee is called such. I woke up this morning to the smell of beef & noodles (which I originally mistook for bacon ... if that tells you where my mind was.) It was a delicious awakening. On my way to church this morning to celebrate with my Brothers & Sisters. I stopped by the MT Cup. Thought I work at Starbucks, this does NOT make me a traitor. I have been going to MT Cup long before Starbucks was in Muncie and it has remained a significant local locale for me. In addition ... they have outstanding bagels!!! And I still prefer Starbucks' chai. So. There. I stopped by the MT Cup for a Sunrise bagel which is egg, cheese and bacon on a bagel of your choice. Accompanied by a chai latte made with whole milk, this breakfast encompassed every item I am forbidden from consuming during Lent. Talk about breaking a fast. Go big or go home.

Honestly, the bagel was not as tasty as I was anticipating, but the freedom of eating what I wanted made up for it. Completely.

This Lent has been very exciting AND enlightening. It has opened up several conversations as I talk with coworkers, customers and family members about what I've chosen to do and how my experience has been thus far. And it's only one week in! Although, I'm sure it will fade, but oh well.

Commonway again was a place of joy and belonging for me this morning. A reminder of why I'm still in Muncie. Church seems to be the continual blessing in any place where I am living. I have some cousins who are moving back to the midwest after living in Southern California for a few years. Part of their reason for moving home is the lack of community in California. While I don't doubt that, I also say "go to church!" If not for the celebration of Christ's life and death and the transformation of our lives in His, then for the community! I personally see no problem with (at least initially) going to church to find community. God has called us not to live alone. It's right that we should seek community within the source of all Community. True, finding an ideal church is actually impossible, but even finding a near-ideal church is difficult. But it's less difficult than trying to build community striking it out on your own. Especially if "your own" involves a spouse and a small child ... your options are suddenly limited - or focused, although your immediate community has expanded.

Thoroughly enjoying the NPR "All Songs Considered" podcast. How have I not heard of this before?!

Sometimes I Fail

I have a confession to make.

I've broken my fast. A few times now.

But not from eating. That's still going strong. And let me tell you. Whole Foods Market and Trader Joe's are a Lenten faster's best friend! So many things are now made dairy-free, it's almost like cheating! Is it still fasting if I'm eating soy cookies? I don't know. It somehow feels unfair. And yet, in all honesty, I am still being very intentional, which is part of the process I think.

So how I cheated. Well. Obviously, I haven't been blogging every day. Also. I had an audition in Louisville last night and I listened to secular music. It's my "pump-me-up-for-my-audition" playlist. I tried to go without it, but I just couldn't handle having to sit in that warm-up rooming hearing the oboes all around me. It was a terrifying experience. I really don't care for the oboe too much, nor for most oboists. Why can't we all just be normal? I suppose they think they are normal. And maybe they are ... amongst other oboists.

I just wanted to come clean about that.

But it also proves a point to me. Clearly, food is not necessarily a good fasting item for me, because it's fairly easy for me to follow a new food regimen. But my time and my mind. Those are two really difficult places for me to fast. It's difficult for me to spend my time well. To invest it well and in lasting causes. I normally just end up choosing to watch a ridiculous Amanda Bynes movie, all the way through. Knowing and acknowledging that it is indeed one of the most worthless movies ever to be made and spent money on. And it makes it even worse because I chose, in full consciousness, to waste my time watching it. And my music, what I put into my head. That is clearly a very important part of how I operate, because for me to go without it is more often than not very difficult.

It also brings up the question, which I've been speaking of often with my friends actually, which is "what is the point of lent and fasting"? And I don't completely know. My friend Jessica and I discussed it a little bit last night while she was keeping me awake for my drive home from Louisville. Part of fasting is choosing something you really might fail at fasting from. It's not so much about works and proving that you can give something up, which sometimes we focus on and thereby miss the meaning of the process. You choose something you might fail with/about/on (I don't know the proper preposition) and you try anyway, and when/if you do fail, you try again. Because that's what we do in our everyday Christian faith as well. We don't just give up on faith because we sin. No! That's ridiculous! We wouldn't be Christians for longer than an hour after receiving Christ if it worked that way! And in that case, no one would be a Christian because it wouldn't make it out of the first generation! We fail every day. We sin. Part of lent is putting that propensity to fail front and center, but not become despondent about it. We also don't embrace it. But we then are forced to see the need for our Savior more obviously and we can then appreciate or value His Salvation all the more. That's part of it at least. Or that's where my conversation with Jessica and my small group conversation led me.

God left me a little sticky-note love note yesterday. It sounds cheesy, I know. Full awareness and I gag a little saying it, but it's what it felt like. It was in the following song:

Enter the Worship Circle - Nothing Can Stop You

I really like the oompah/boom-chicks.